Learning Self-Trust for Personal and Professional Success with Stacy Bahrenfuss, Founder of The Truth Teachers™

About this episode:

Stacy Bahrenfuss, Founder of The Truth Teachers™, joins us on this podcast. Known as The Truth Teacher, and a visionary intuitive Stacy works privately consulting 7- and 8-figure women leaders and their teams, leading them to activate all of their power and accelerate their success personally and professionally. Stacy and her Truth Teachers™ are on a mission to revolutionize the entire self-help industry by eliminating gurus and empowering people with the tools and framework to transform their own lives. 

Topics Discussed:

• Why she created Truth Teachers™ and how her company helps leaders become more confident

• The one word that Stacy believes holds high performers back most

• How understanding our language can tell us what’s going on in our subconscious 

• Her thoughts on self-trust and its importance in business success

About Stacy:

After building a 7-figure business at the age of 19 where she helped clients find their external home in real estate, Stacy Bahrenfuss now guides women leaders to their internal home. 

Known as The Truth Teacher, and a visionary intuitive, Stacy is the Founder of The Truth Teachers™ and works privately consulting 7- and 8-figure women leaders and their teams, leading them to activate all of their power and accelerate their success personally and professionally. 

Stacy and her Truth Teachers™ are on a mission to revolutionize the entire self-help industry by eliminating gurus and empowering people with the tools and framework to transform their own lives. Stacy is a 2020 Winner of the Gold Stevie Award in Consumer services with 10 or less employees. 

Read a raw, unedited transcript of this episode:

You built a successful real estate business when you were 19. Tell us about your experience and what made you decide to pivot and launch Truth Teachers. The business that you ran today?

In launching my real estate company, one thing that was always very present for me with clients was focusing on where they were coming from, from their inner state, when they were selling the house, even when I was taking them through the process of buying the house, even though we were talking about the technical pieces of buying and selling your house, the conversation would always go to what their intentions were. Empowering them to see that in a very stressful situation, they could choose a different inner state throughout a stressful process, because so often we believe that it's the outer thing or situation that's causing us this stress. And the truth is, we always have a choice. We always have free will. And so that was always a part of the conversation, and I had always been on my own personal development journey. What had happened was I built the real estate company to, its peak and I realized that I was not fulfilled. And so that started my journey of digging deeper what was going on. You know, from the outside, it looks like I had no, I was happy and but deep down, I was really in the suffering. And so, yeah, so that started the process. And so in 2016, I was inspired to launch this work in the truth, teachers, but had a lot of unraveling to do. with the real estate company and pivoting out of that. And so that's what inspired the work with the truth teachers is understanding the power we have when it comes to our emotions, when it comes to our power of choosing our inner state. And that is the fuel of what inspired me to love, such as teachers.

And I can see how you would have that experience with buyers because built this home when I was pregnant with our twins and when I think about selling this home one day, it's very emotional. There's so much that goes into it whether it's happy or sad or the frustrations of the buy sell process. I see how you can see clients going through all of those emotions.

Absolutely. the most prevalent conversation was this idea of really commanding into existence what they wanted to experience and guiding them to have the successful sale, but understanding that through that struggle that they could discover almost tools of opportunities to start controlling their thoughts and beliefs and emotions around it. And tell us about truth teachers and your approach to mindset. How is your approach to mindset different?

The truth teachers were really born, like I said, from trying to figure out my own suffering. And so by doing all the coaching and different personal development tracks that I had subscribed to originally. What I noticed was that after I completed each program, I still felt the same, there was something that was not transforming. And so I was on a mission to figure that out, And then so what I discovered was that there's been this whole idea around,what I'm calling motion set that we really need to discuss before mindset can actually take root and help us transform and create the reality that we want if we have emotions or patterns and programs that are running in the background in the subconscious. We're unable to truly deploy the mind set strategies that work really well, right? But we're unable to fully change transform from the inside out without addressing that. And so that started the process of creating the truth teachers and the truth teachers. What we want to do is help people transform from the inside out and understand that we can be fueled by our inner being vs. external success validation. because that's how we're conditioned of people is to get love and belonging and get external satisfaction or validation. And that's our fuel to create versus flipping it on its head, if you will, and learning how to create from the inside out.

That's so true because we can take in all of these things that are coming to us from outside. It's like, what does success? Really mean to you. Not. What does success mean from the outside and good for you for having the confidence to dig deep and figure that out? Because it's not always easy to do.

It's not, it is an everyday decision, right? I constantly in process and peeling back that next layer, and I think for all of us as people, the more that we can realize that we're literally just a huge onion and we're just feeling that this layer and it's a never ending process, then we can have genuine compassion for our journey vs. beat ourselves up because we're not there yet, because that's also easy to do.

Mm-Hmm. That's so true. You mentioned programing. How do you suggest we realize our old programing, what might be working, what might not and what do you suggest we do next?

Looking at your programing, it's looking at what patterns are showing up in your personal life, in your professional life. See if you can find a pattern that's playing personally, professionally, not necessarily with the same people, look and see if you're with different people having the same pattern. Because when you can start to uncover that the people externally are not again what's causing the trigger or the pattern, then you can start to really take 100 percent responsibility for this playing out and really see it for what it is without the story. the first step is if there is something that is not working in your life or even that you're less than thrilled with, we all are on our path to success, whatever that means for us. And so the levels of satisfaction vary, so if there's anything that you want to improve in your life, see if there's a pattern that's playing out that's keeping you stuck. Then once you see that, see if you can find that pattern in an area that's not related, because that's when you can really pull it from the root, because that's the whole idea of this work is being able to see it at the root, because that's seeing the truth. And that's only when you can be free of it is when you see the truth for what it is. It's so true. It's so interesting when we think about the things that are holding us back and why they are holding us back. And it's interesting that you say to look at it in a different place, you know, in a place that might be unrelated to where you think you might be holding yourself back because we don't always do that Right. a lot of times if there's a challenge in the business, we don't necessarily think, is this showing up in my marriage or is this showing up, in my relationships anywhere? And it's fascinating when you can start to see, Oh, it might not be exactly that pattern, but it's a different flavor. Maybe it's it's a strawberry, but you can see the similarities and then be empowered to change it.

A great plant success story. She was having some challenges with one of her team members of the business. And by seeing that it was something that was manifesting actually in her childhood and just a different way, she was able to get in touch with the feelings that were unresolved from her childhood and things in the business started to open up in such a way that she could address the true challenge for what it was and be able to move through it. The other great thing when you start to clean up one area, when you start to see these similarities, playing out in two different areas of life that see the same underlying pattern. What's amazing about it is it's completely clearing it out for good. Where if you're only looking at it almost like from a worm's eye view instead of a bird's eye view, you're not able to clean it out and really purify your consciousness. Because that's what this work is working with consciousness. So, as you purify that, you're really helping not only yourself, but your children yourself and the collective at large.

And I've always found it so amazing that even when you make some minor changes in a direction, life just gets so much better and the whole situation gets so much better. And then you want to do more of that thing that you are improving. You believe that self trust is one of the missing things from even the most successful businesses. Why do you think that is?

So self-test is interesting because we all have it to some extent, but as leaders, as entrepreneurs, much of our confidence is contrived at the beginning because we have to start somewhere. And confidence is much different than self trust. When we can see that difference in self trust is really this internal relationship,Where no matter what feedback you're getting from the external world, you're so tuned in to what you're about. But you see, we haven't been programed as people conditioned to start with self trust. We've been conditioned to build confidence where that's all external. And so if we can cultivate self trust and build this internal muscle, this internal self trust muscle. The way you move throughout the world is completely different with a flow and an ease versus confidence. You could even say like it's more masculine, you're pushing your forcing, you're creating this thing out of that external feeling of confidence versus actually internal.

It's so true. Every time I haven't trusted my instincts, I've regretted it, so I've really tried to hone in on that muscle. And one of the things that I find the most is when hiring team members. when I have that feeling, Oh, this is going to work out most of the time it does. when you have it, the other feeling of, I'm not sure about this. So that's one area where, I've really learned to trust that instinct.

Yes. Because when you trust yourself and team is such a great example, because for all of us, it's like, Oh, I should have listened to that, you had that initial feeling. It's like the more that we can actually use that in our daily decisions outside of time, really in that briefing, that's business. The more that we're turning into our superpower, which is co-creating with guidance, with that trust to create something that is uniquely ours and only what we can do in the world.

That's so true because most of the time we know, yeah, most of the time we know, and sometimes it's those outside influences that can cause us to make a different decision.

Right, exactly.

You say there is one word that high performers use that holds them back the most. What is that word and why?

So that word is frustrated. What's so interesting is whenever we use the word frustrated, what we're doing subconsciously is we are claiming victim consciousness. We are saying that this is happening to us. We are taking the brunt of something or we're at the mercy of something else. And that couldn't be further from the truth. And so our language tells us what's going on in our subconscious. One of my favorite quotes is our word is our one. And if we start to get obsessed with our language, we'll start to craft a more empowering reality and be able to step into that. And so evaluating how often we use the word frustrated and what's fascinating is I observe that the highest performers actually views that more. When you're busy, it's easier to choose being frustrated than it is to actually do something about it. And so when you can bring a level of awareness to our language, consciously choose what we're speaking words where you say it starts to create a whole new container for us to step into. It's so true because when you are busy running a business, having a family, all of the things, there's just more things to cause frustration. So you're so right when you put yourself in that mindset of how do I figure out a solution,And not stay muddled in that moment? Life is just better and things happen more easily. Yes, exactly.

So true. Really good advice. How and why do you think high achievers hide from true breakthroughs, and I love this because you're finding the confidence to do the things that we want to do or, like you say, trusting our inner selves can be hard. And sometimes when we're right there on that moment of a breakthrough, that can be the scariest moment and the scariest times.

Yes. Yeah. Well, it's so interesting because so often I know for me as well and clients I work with, it's like, we're at that breakthrough and we're like, God, it makes total sense. And what happens next is everything. It is either that the breakthrough gets integrated or it just stays that breakthrough. And I love this this talking point, because so often we think we have something, but we don't slow down enough to let it integrate to let it sink in. And so it stays on the surface as a breakthrough instead of a transformation. And so the way that I suggest, discerning, is this a breakthrough or is this actually the transformation is? Are you still on the high of the breakthrough or do you feel it in your body? Because that's really how we can tell,It's like if you have a breakthrough, you have that aha moment. And if it stays there and you go on to the next thing, you can know for sure that that's where it stayed. It stayed on the surface. It didn't necessarily come down to the route to the soil so that it could germinate into a beautiful flower. So it's that whole idea of allowing a little pause or space after an aha so that it can truly become that transformation.

That's so true. And we talk about that a lot with wins. So often we're busy. We have a win and then we just move on to the next thing and not really realizing that when, really feeling it. because we all get in those moments where it's like, Oh, we made this thing happen, OK, what's next? But there's so much more joy when we can feel it within ourselves.

Exactly right. Well, I love that point, too, just because you said something that's critical here, and that's joy. If we really let things permeate, we would allow joy to take place. That's what we're all chasing, right? Is joy or happiness, why we're doing all of this. And so, the more that we can see that we can experience that on a moment to moment basis when we allow a pause, when we can take things in.

Hmm. So true and a perfect transition to my last question. I asked this question at the end of every episode because I believe bringing joy into our daily life is so important. Magic happens when we focus on the part of ourselves, and our business that brings us joy is one tip that you can leave with us today about how you make sure to find and live our joy.

Yes. So know, I think that the biggest thing is paying attention to your inner state and allowing that to guide you. we're only supposed to do things that make us happy and we're not. And hard work sometimes isn't necessarily joyful, but it's so much about that perception filter that you're looking through. And that's what we have the power to change, the power to choose where we find joy. And so being able to do what you love, but the things that you know, many of us don't like to do within the business, but they're still required. You can find joy in that. If you can remember to connect to that inner state, remember to connect to that inner place and allow that to lead you through the things that you don't like to do as much. Connecting to that inner state and paying attention to those emotions and allowing them to pass by versus judging ourselves for feeling whatever we feel throughout the day, also allows us to connect back to joy more frequently because we're not getting stuck in negative emotions or positive because it's very easy, on the other side to get excited and let that run us. It's allowing us to connect to our emotions because there is joy in being fully self expressed.

It's so right. And we do have the ability to choose our thoughts and to your point, when we allow ourselves to flow through those different feelings. It brings more joy into our lives. Thank you so much for sharing all of your knowledge and wisdom today. So many good insights. Can you tell our listeners how and where they can find you? Yes. So the best place to go is our website, which is the truth teachers, plural, dot com